She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Randomize
