garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
