ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
