That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I met this girl the other day and found out her boyfriend is a helicopter pilot. How the fuck do you compete with that.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
