The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
These tits shall not be calmed
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
