Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
