just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
What happened to fro yo and sex?
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize