Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
