There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
being pregnant is like rehab
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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