so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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