I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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