PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
