ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Randomize
