It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
