Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
