I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
