i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
