i just wanna soil my oats bro
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
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