He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
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