Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Randomize
