I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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