just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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