remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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