There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Randomize
