WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Randomize
