You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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