I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize
