I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize