so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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