would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
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