I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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