More tranny stories later!
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
