dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Come see our sink grown plant.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
Randomize