i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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