Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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