i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
You should frame my arrest warrant.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
