we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I could have mohawked her pubes.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
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