i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
My vagina is officially offended.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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