i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
