i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
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