She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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