I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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