Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize
