is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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