my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
i think im in europe. pls send help
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
