ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
