puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
