At least make sure they are 18
Why
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
