The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
porn star boner night. come get it.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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