Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I'm on the porch day drinking and the neighbor is in his yard screaming about his amazing sandwiches, maybe we should move.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Randomize
